Strict constitutionalist birthers attempt to save nation from brewing national threat

The Southerner

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By Molly Daniel

Many are complaining that Georgia has taken a step in the wrong direction when it comes to racial acceptance. In January 2012 the ‘birthers,’ a group of strict constitutionalists, filed a second lawsuit against President Obama and tried to have his name removed from the Georgia primary ballot for faking a U.S. birth certificate.

For those who don’t know, the birthers are a group of people, led by Anthony Martin of Chicago, who “seek strict adherence to the Constitution of the United States”. These “bastions of truth” (according to their website) are the people who requested that President Obama release his birth certificate to the public in April 2011. These very same people are now suing our president for forgery of official documents, claiming that his Hawaiian birth certificate is a fake.

Unfortunately the crackpot of a judge, Michael Malihi, tossed the birther’s case aside, saying the evidence was “unsatisfactory” and “insufficient to support allegations.” Clearly the evidence is being hidden by the government in a scheme to singe out the birthers and make them look foolish.

I, for one, am in complete agreement with the birthers. When President Obama was first accused, he allowed the public a glimpse of his birth certificate. Naturally, everyone’s first thought is that he made a fake birth certificate. I mean, how stupid could the people of this country be to believe that President Obama would show us real documents? Forging these legal documents gave him a break from sitting in his office eating bon-bons all day.

And why would he tell us the truth? Our president obviously has so much to hide. Everything he wrote in his book, Dreams From My Father, is clearly a false trail for the oblivious minds of America to wander down, a ploy to cover-up his secret plans for this country.

In fact, President Obama must be a terrorist seeking revenge on our country. He hasn’t committed any terrorist acts in the four years he has been in office because he was building our trust. If he is re-elected surely he will unveil his intricate plan to sell our country to North Korea. Thank goodness for the birthers, who will surely be credited for saving our poor country from the diabolical Barack Obama, our fake president.

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